My Sweet Honey

The weather is turning colder and the days a little shorter, and when the chill of Fall sets in, my thoughts turn to sipping warm tea, and my mind wanders into the past and stories of tea and sweet honey and frantic hilarity swirl in my subconscious...
I left the house on a drizzly Saturday autumn morning, presumably to do some grocery shopping or some other errand without any children in tow.  A lovely break for a busy Mom, to be out of the house for an hour or two alone, leaving kids to the care of my dear husband.  When I came back home and let myself in the back door, I could see the washing machine churning and I was filled with warm fuzzies to think that while I was gone, the household chores were not forgotten!  How nice that a load of laundry was being done for me.  I set down the grocery bags and proceeded further into the house, where I was surprised to find Mike on his hands and knees, in his boxers, scrubbing the floor.  Now, laundry is one thing, but washing the kitchen floor in your underwear?  What on earth was going on?  Mike looked up at me, a little flustered, and gave me a weak smile.  "I just wanted some honey in my tea"
Setting out to make himself a steaming cup of tea, he had searched through the cupboards for a forgotten jar of honey to sweeten his drink, but when he found it he saw that the honey had gotten somewhat crystallized.  No problem!  Those crystals can be easily dissolved with some heat - so put some water on to boil.  Once the water had boiled, he poured it in a big bowl and set the honey container inside to melt.  So far, so good.  But here the plot starts to unravel.  The honey was only dissolving around the outside of the jar, and there was still a big solid piece stuck in the middle.  Not wanting to take a simple spoon out to stir when you can use the big guns, Mike grabbed the hand mixer from the cupboard, inserted one beater, stuck it in the honey jar and turned it on. 
The beater got lodged in the honey clump, and instead of the honey mixing inside the jar, the jar started spinning around with the beater.  Since it had been sitting in a bowl of boiling water, it was too hot to grab and stop the spinning movement.  Panic set in, and Mike forgot to let go of the mixer controls - the steaming hot jar of half-molten honey went flying around and around and around, sending arc after arc of melted liquid honey in concentric circles around my kitchen.  Honey on my counter, cupboards, blinds, windows, stove, sink, floor...and all over my dear husband, who had only wanted to sit down with a hot cup of sweetened tea, and who now had managed to coat every surface in the kitchen with hot, sticky honey.  A frantic attempt was made to clean up the mess before I got home - stripping off sticky clothes, trying to wipe up the floor with a sticky kitchen cloth, and getting everything into the washer.  And any minute now, one of his student's parents was supposed to show up to pick up a homework package. 
It took a good amount of scrubbing to get the kitchen floor back to normal, and I don't know if I ever managed to get all the honey off my kitchen blinds.  I suggest that if you have to melt your crystallized honey, it would be best to stir it with a spoon.